Today is my friend’s birthday, but…

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Today is my friend’s 18th birthday.

I did attend her surprise birthday party and gave her a nice gift, wished her on time and put on an obligatory birthday wish status and display picture with her to tell her how much she means to me. But as I was typing a long birthday wish for her, I had a flashback of the moments we have spent together in college and the only thing that came in my mind was a bitter comment made by her about me in front of everyone, including me. The memory of that day and that moment was still alive, hemmed in some corner of my brain, now dancing shamelessly like a harlot in front of my eyes, reminding me of the day my soul was torn apart from my body.

It wasn’t a bad comment on my character, it was on my personality. The reason it pierced my heart so much was because I have heard that comment before, from someone else, someone who claimed to be my best friend. And even though we are still in contact whenever I think about her the first thing that comes in my mind is the same comment. And I’d be lying if I say that it doesn’t hurt me. Because it does. It certainly does. And we all know that physical wounds can be healed but emotional wounds cannot. The pain of that comment will always stay in my heart and even if that (the birthday girl) was incredibly sweet and helpful to me in past, even though she apologized a lot for that comment later on and even though I have forgiven her, the first memory that comes of her in my mind will always be that same comment.

Please, never think for a moment that your words don’t have any effect on others.  Bitter words hurt more than the peeling of skin from our body with the help of a knife, more than the pain of a completely broken nail from our skin. And even if you think someone is not as good as you please keep it to yourself and don’t say that on their face. Because there is a 99% chance he already knows that, and secretly he is just trying to change that. Think from your heart before you speak, keep yourself in his place and think how would you feel if you were him and someone said the same to you? You would never forgive him/her. It takes a trillion compliments to build someone’s personality and your one harsh comment can take it all down, or worse, just kill him from inside.

Spread peace, love and kindness!

Love,

Fiya.

I’m learning French!

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I’m learning a new language!

Well, actually I’m trying to learn French, a language that I’m sure I don’t need to learn because I don’t think my life will ever take me to France or any African country where I’d have to use it. But well, I LOVE travelling and exploring different cultures so you never know. Maybe one day God would have mercy on me and take me to all those places that I really really really want to go.

sighs
I wish.

Well, For today, I learnt eleven phrases.

  1. Bonjour— Hello!
  2. Mon prenom est Fiya— My name is Fiya
  3. Comment allez-vous?— How are you?
  4. Je suis tres bien— I’m fine
  5. Je t’aime— I love you
  6. Mademoiselle— Miss!
  7. Comment s’appelle ton pere?— What is your father’s name?
  8. Mon pere s’appelle S.S.M— My father’s name is S.S.M
  9. Je suis perdu— I am lost
  10. Aidez-moi!— help me!
  11. Au Revoir!— Goodbye!

I’m so excited to learn more. When I learn something it makes me feel so useful and valuable. It makes me feel that I’m not totally wasting my life doing nothing and that I’m turning myself into a prized possession. I love learning and expanding my knowledge. For me, learning is a necessary exercise for my brain and I want my brain to be in action 24/7.

I really want to share a power boosting quote with you guys, I’m not really sure who said it but the internet says Mahatma Gandhi said it so I’m giving credits to him.

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.”
-Mahatma Gandhi.


Au Revoir!

Fiya.

His beloved (a short story)

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Joe walked down the stairs in a hurry, his vision blurring and causing him to miss two steps at a time. He was already late. He had to look at Jade one more time, or maybe last time before she goes to take her class. Her class was just in two minutes. He could not let this opportunity pass, he had to have a glance at his sweetheart, bask in her smile and adore those big blue eyes with lashes so long one could see their shadow on her upper cheeks. Her lips firmly molded and her hair so long, smooth and silky, they reminded him of Arabian silk. Her sweet laugh could mend anyone’s broken heart and fix their torn soul. She was a lovely young beauty, full of life and glamour, a happy go lucky sort. He longed to hold her, to pinch her cheeks, touch her hair and be the cause of her smile. He loved her and he needed her, more than anything in this world. She was his life, without her it was impossible for him to survive.

His heart was thumping so hard he knew he could die at any tick of the clock. He ran in a hurry to the right block where her class was. He looked to the right, and then to the left. He felt like his heartbeat had stopped.
She was not there.

She was gone to her class. He wouldn’t be able to see her today, wouldn’t be able to rejoice in her lovely laugh and who knows about tomorrow? it isn’t promised. His jaw dropped. His eyes suddenly became red, filled with salty water of his emotions. His forehead became sweaty, his vision started blurring and his hands started trembling. Downhearted and low spirited, he raised his hands to himself as if praying to God and stared at his sweaty palms, trying to read the luck lines. He couldn’t believe on his bad luck when suddenly he heard echoes of laughter and two girls coming out of her class as if punished by the teacher.

It was her!

His darling, his angel, his sweet one. Laughing and high-fiving her friend, she stole a glance at Joe who was staring lovingly at her. Not knowing who he is, except that he was a school mate, she passed a confused smile at him. He laughed. How lucky he felt at that moment, She finally noticed him! She finally knew he existed on the last day of his existence.

On the last day of his existence

Even being so attractive that he stood out among his mates like a striking, magnificent jungle cat surrounded by harmless baby kittens, he decided not to propose her. Not because he was afraid to be rejected… but because he did not want to be accepted. He smiled at her, for one last time while she giggled with her friend, standing out of the class, completely unaware of the fact that this handsome young man standing right in front of him is madly in love with her, and also, that he is suffering from Brain cancer, a disease of which he was sure he is not going to survive because his doctors had already told him so. The cancer had spread, causing a severe headache, seizures and vision blurring. He came to school every day, just to catch a glimpse of her one more time, to listen to her laughter and to look at her and pray to God to give her all the happiness in the world, and to give him a chance to catch a sight of her,just one more time.

Just one more time

It was his last day on Earth, last day with her.

But the first day of his existence in the eyes of his beloved.

Struggles of a young blogger

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My basic struggle as a young blogger is the language barrier. English is my third language, the first two being Urdu and Punjabi. I usually have a lot of ideas and expressions in my mind but as cool and amusing they sound in Urdu, when I convert them into English they seem absurd and boring.

My second struggle or fear—whatever you call it, is that I’m afraid to get judged. I mean, I’ve a lot to say on my mind but I dare not transform them into words, fearing that I will be labeled as ‘young ungrateful narcissist B****’

My third struggle is writing to please my audience. I think twice about posting stuff on wordpress because I’m afraid no one would appreciate my work and reject me. But Getting rejected is everyone’s greatest fear, isn’t it?

I’m currently trying to confront my fears and sparing no effort to make sense of my words. I hope that I succeed in it.

I love it how people on Word press tell me that I don’t seem to be so young, I’m like that since forever. My grandpa says I have a 50 year old head on my 17 years old shoulder.
Really Grandpa? Am I as smart as a 50 year old? Well, Nevermind.
But Oh, don’t underestimate me; I’m still as cool as a cucumber 😉

With this post, I continue my journey as a young blogger.

Rawr!
Fiya.

Day 2: 100 good deeds Challenge

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Day 2:
Dear God,
Thank you for keeping me alive and healthy and for making me a happy and carefree person. Thank you for giving me a lovely day and bestowing upon me the five senses of seeing, hearing, tasting, touching and smelling through which I can live life to the fullest on this glorious day.
I therefore feel that it is my duty to be good to your creations like you do well to me and my family.
My six good deeds of today are as follows:

6. Donated a very small part of my pocket money to charity (Sahara foundation!)

7. Spoke truth when I didn’t wanted to (This one was the hardest 😦 )

8. Donated old school books to a poor kid (Education is everyone’s right!)

9. Held a door for an old lady who was holding heavy bags (Got a bright smile and a sweet ‘Thank you, May God bless you!’ as my reward from her!)

10. Helped a friend to prepare chocolate mousse (Yummmm!)

11. While standing in the line after buying some grocery items, I let the person behind me (who was holding only a cola) come in front of me to save her time.

12. Told an aunt that she looks 10 years younger than her age (I wasn’t lying by the way) and made her day!

Kindness never goes wasted.
What if any of your good deed makes God so happy that he decides to bless you with whatever you had been wishing for so long?
Take a chance,do a good deed every day!

Love,

Fiya.