Today is my friend’s birthday, but…

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Today is my friend’s 18th birthday.

I did attend her surprise birthday party and gave her a nice gift, wished her on time and put on an obligatory birthday wish status and display picture with her to tell her how much she means to me. But as I was typing a long birthday wish for her, I had a flashback of the moments we have spent together in college and the only thing that came in my mind was a bitter comment made by her about me in front of everyone, including me. The memory of that day and that moment was still alive, hemmed in some corner of my brain, now dancing shamelessly like a harlot in front of my eyes, reminding me of the day my soul was torn apart from my body.

It wasn’t a bad comment on my character, it was on my personality. The reason it pierced my heart so much was because I have heard that comment before, from someone else, someone who claimed to be my best friend. And even though we are still in contact whenever I think about her the first thing that comes in my mind is the same comment. And I’d be lying if I say that it doesn’t hurt me. Because it does. It certainly does. And we all know that physical wounds can be healed but emotional wounds cannot. The pain of that comment will always stay in my heart and even if that (the birthday girl) was incredibly sweet and helpful to me in past, even though she apologized a lot for that comment later on and even though I have forgiven her, the first memory that comes of her in my mind will always be that same comment.

Please, never think for a moment that your words don’t have any effect on others.  Bitter words hurt more than the peeling of skin from our body with the help of a knife, more than the pain of a completely broken nail from our skin. And even if you think someone is not as good as you please keep it to yourself and don’t say that on their face. Because there is a 99% chance he already knows that, and secretly he is just trying to change that. Think from your heart before you speak, keep yourself in his place and think how would you feel if you were him and someone said the same to you? You would never forgive him/her. It takes a trillion compliments to build someone’s personality and your one harsh comment can take it all down, or worse, just kill him from inside.

Spread peace, love and kindness!

Love,

Fiya.

No more nightmares!

Maybe this is the start of my blissful journey towards a renewed life

Maybe this is the ecstasy that I had been longing for.

 

Love,

Fiya.

Dear world.

Hi, I am Fiya. And I am absolutely done with people. I’m literally done with people.

You think you own the world? You think you own that person standing in front of you? You think you can make fun of that person whenever you want? Well, guess what. You can. Why? Because God probably loves you and not that person, that’s why he’s letting this happen to him.

What? Did I say anything wrong? Oops! My bad, but probably nothing bad is going to happen to me. Why? Because God loves me and not you. Yep.

What?

Dear world,

The purpose of this post is to remind you all that you don’t own anyone, you don’t own a country, you don’t decide how the person is going to feel about a certain thing. No one is anyone’s slave. This is a free world. You don’t decide about who’s God’s favorite. You don’t decide which religion, which country, which particular community or person is God’s favorite. What if you— the one who thinks God totally adores you, are the least particular favorite of God and that person you just insulted is God’s top favorite but you don’t know it?

I am screaming virtually, begging you. Please, stop judging, stop assuming that you rule, be submissive to God, be forgiving.
Make this world a better place, don’t fill this beautiful world with your ill will. We don’t need your bitterness. We don’t need your insolence, we don’t need any slandering. We don’t need any more misery or troubles in our lives.

Stop taunting that girl about her looks because its fuckin hurting her!

Stop favoring that particular child of yours over other because it’s killing the other one’s self confidence!

Stop assuming that no one is better than you, because one day you are going to be proved wrong. Your pride will be shattered into tiny pieces.

Stop destroying that beautiful country where you were born, who fed you, where you find peace, which is your identity. For God’s sake, It is your home!

Stop, just stop insulting that guy over his dumbness. God made him dumb, he cannot help it! Please!

Stop ruining that girl’s life just because you hate her. She deserves peace in her life after what you did to her.

Stop assuming you are the nicest person in this world. Because that’s what you are not!

What you are doing to that person can happen to you tomorrow! Karma is a real bitch, don’t mess with it, because you can’t rule over KARMA. You just cant.

Sincerely,

Pretty disappointed,

Fiya.

That dream.

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I gave birth to the idea of that dream, composed it, nurtured it and fed it like a baby. I fashioned it. I was the one who spent her days and nights aiding the growth of that dream. I was really hopeful. I loved it, I cherished it and I protected it from everything and everyone. I actually lived for that dream. I became too ambitious, my work drive became too much for me to handle but I did not let it go. I dedicated my body, my soul, my mind and my heart to that only dream.

 I had a blind trust on Universe but one day, it decided to betray me.I still held onto my dream, clutching it in my pure heart, through the bitter storms and crushing earthquakes, through awful thundering and crazy snowfalls, through horrible cyclones and hot and disastrous volcanic eruptions. As a result, I got grubby, I got muddy, I got crushed into bits and pieces, I got electrified, I got numb with cold, I got muddled… I got burnt! but I was sure that my dream is out of any harm,  it’s in my heart, safe and secure and I am going to nourish it more and accomplish it one day.

 I was so close to my dream. I was so sure that it is safe in my heart and in the depth of my soul. I touched my heart and felt it there, my lovely dream. A feeling of joy passed through my burnt veins. It is there! I cried. I pulled it out, slowly and affectionately… I stared at it, horrified. My hands started trembling and my eyes grew wider in shock.

 It was broken, it was ruined! My dream was broken. The dream that meant everything to me. I raised my dream to sky in an act of asking the universe to justify its act, and in a result the sky showered rain, melting my dream and letting it seep into the ground, a harsh slap from the universe for relying on it.

I sat down on my knees and rubbed my hand slightly over the soil, smoothing the part which had my dream buried in it. I shouted, I screamed, I cried. It did not lessen my pain. It did not help me to forgive myself!

………..sighs, guess I’ll never be able to trust myself again

……Guess I’ll never be able to dream again……

 

 

 

 

Day 2: 100 good deeds Challenge

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Day 2:
Dear God,
Thank you for keeping me alive and healthy and for making me a happy and carefree person. Thank you for giving me a lovely day and bestowing upon me the five senses of seeing, hearing, tasting, touching and smelling through which I can live life to the fullest on this glorious day.
I therefore feel that it is my duty to be good to your creations like you do well to me and my family.
My six good deeds of today are as follows:

6. Donated a very small part of my pocket money to charity (Sahara foundation!)

7. Spoke truth when I didn’t wanted to (This one was the hardest 😦 )

8. Donated old school books to a poor kid (Education is everyone’s right!)

9. Held a door for an old lady who was holding heavy bags (Got a bright smile and a sweet ‘Thank you, May God bless you!’ as my reward from her!)

10. Helped a friend to prepare chocolate mousse (Yummmm!)

11. While standing in the line after buying some grocery items, I let the person behind me (who was holding only a cola) come in front of me to save her time.

12. Told an aunt that she looks 10 years younger than her age (I wasn’t lying by the way) and made her day!

Kindness never goes wasted.
What if any of your good deed makes God so happy that he decides to bless you with whatever you had been wishing for so long?
Take a chance,do a good deed every day!

Love,

Fiya.

Day 1: 100 good deeds challenge,

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Day1: Big or small, a deed is a deed. What if a small good deed that means nothing to you, means a lot to someone? What if it is enough to save someone’s life?

My five good deeds of today are as follows:

1- Donated two of my dresses to charity (a maid who needed clothes for her little girls, I belong to a poor country, you see)

2- Donated a very small part of my pocket money to a cancer hospital (My dear country fellows, you all know which hospital I am talking about. Don’t you? * smirks *)

3-
Prepared a dessert for my family (Going to post the recipe later, Promise!)

4- Watered some plants (I’ve a beautiful, spacious lawn at the front yard of my home, one of the blessings of Almighty God)

5-
Fulfilled a promise that I made to my younger brother (Brought Cola for him)


Don’t forget to do a good deed every day!
🙂

Love,

Fiya.